Sometimes, being a mom to a toddler just plain hurts. Now, I'm not talking about all the many times she has sat on my head, stood on my ankle, poked me in the eye, or otherwise maimed my person. Those are pain-inflicting moments, yes. I have bruises in various odd locations due to some overly rough play/wrestling.
But here's what hurts the most: how unbelievably horrendously sickeningly cute she is and yet WILL NOT SNUGGLE.
That was really disgustingly saccharine and I do apologize for making you nauseous on a Monday.
I do not, however, apologize for drooling on my baby because she's so awfully adorable.
First of all, I don't think there is anything I love more than seeing Reagan right after she wakes up. This morning Hubby brought her to see me just after he got her up from a deep sleep. Her eyes were barely half open. She blinked at me slowly, then stretched her arms and rubbed them around her already messy hair and yawned a big, slow yawn. Yes. It made me melt.
Last night I went to church myself because Reagan is still overcoming a cold/cough that we all enjoyed as one big happy family this past week. When I got home, she had her pajamas on and was in the process of going through her bedtime routine. But she stopped everything she was doing to run to the stop of the stairs, giggling uncontrollably, just to say hi to me and give me a big smile and wave. I'm goo.
I bought her this pair of pajamas - sincerely hoping they would fit her this winter. It was a gamble. They are 18 month-size (she's nearly 24 months NOW) and they are blanket sleepers (aka footie pajamas). As of right now, they fit perfectly. And they are the softest pajamas in the whole wide world. Soft and white with little pink and red snowflakes. All I want to do is wrap a blanket around the two of us and drift off to sleep. Of course she won't let me, but I hold her as often as I can when she's wearing those pjs. A total puddle, I am.
It isn't even all her sweet little soft pajamaness that makes me think she's cute. Every once in a while, she gets a burst of energy and all she can do is run from room to room and giggle when she sees us. She tries to jump and BARELY leaves the ground - but you know she's trying because she yells "JUMP!" and then loses her balance. She likes to say "Bye bye" and follow it with "SUUUUUUUUE!" which is just her shortened version of "SEE YOU". She likes to say her own nickname and frequently chants "Pete Pete!" All of this just makes me want to squeeze her and cover her head in kisses.
Now, not EVERYTHING she does is adorable. I know this. I have not completely left reality. I do not think she is perfect or an angel. I think she definitely has a naughty streak and certainly tests my patience. But I've learned a few very impactful and striking times in my life that children are to be TREASURED. And I really truly do know and understand that I have been blessed far beyond anything I could have possibly earned. What a gift. A precious, sinful but loved, gift.