The nasty machines that connect us

I type all my blog entries on a computer - obviously. And just as obviously, you read my blog entries on a computer. Day-in day-out these machines are a part of our lives. I hardly know of a business that doesn't rely, in some form, on a computer. Even if they don't have one, their suppliers do, etc. Its a nasty chain. And here's why.

When they don't work, the whole world nearly ceases to move for some of us. When I sit down at my desk and my computer malfunctions, I am at a loss. I nearly forget how to accomplish even the most menial tasks. I pick up papers, look at them listlessly, and put them back down again - not sure how to do any part of these projects. Its absolutely crippling. Even my pile of filing looks ominous in the now-absent-glow of the computer screen.

Its at these times when we find ourselves feebly reaching for the nearest phone, carefully dialing numbers which we have hopefully written down on a piece of paper (and not just in a file on our computer). We throw ourselves at the mercy of some of the most patient people on earth - computer technicians. Techies. We blubber our way through problems, trying to sound intelligent by saying things like "dialog box" and "command". In the end, we just manage to sound like really whiny and computer-illiterate masses of nervousness. Fortunately, they have pity on us and come to our rescue.

I have always prided myself on being able to follow most of the techy's commands. Click on _________. Select ___________. What operating system are you running? I can do all that. You can imagine my frustration and shame when today, after 45 minutes on the phone with a very nice guy named Derek in Ohio, I was no closer to fixing my problem than when I had begun. The solution to this problem is tricky, if not completely ironic. I threw myself at the feet /mercy of yet another techy.

After a full half day of attempting to get this mess of wires, buttons, screens, chips, etc. back in working order, I have not learned HOW to get it fixed. But here is what I do know. Derek buys a new pair of shoes once a year - after everyone else in his house buys a new pair of shoes. Derek laughs at my jokes, especially when I accidentally hang up on him, he calls back, and I tell him my stupidity has now seeped across my desk and infected my phone as well. Derek has a 20 year old vehicle with 300,000 miles which he does not bring in to get tuned up. He brings it in only when it dies. He has another vehicle (an '89) which runs well. Derek has a southern accent. Derek and his wife are on their 7th set of cordless phones in 6 years. Derek goes to lunch at 1:00 everyday. Derek, the officially titled "computer tech" googles my problem to find solutions.

What I have learned - if I cannot use my computer to communicate with loved ones and friends, I can always call a computer tech and get to know them and make a whole new set of friends.