Happy 15th Birthday, Maddie!

Dear Maddie,

Today you are 15 years old.  Finally.  Already.  I say “finally” because you seem so much older than you are at times.  And I say “already” because those 15 years went by in an absolute flash. 

You are an extremely determined young woman.  You approach so many challenges in life with a quiet calm resolve.  The work to succeed is hard at times, but you put in the time and the effort and often it pays off.  You get very good grades in school because you try.  The flip side is that you put a lot of pressure on yourself and at times that’s too much of a burden to bear.  We always tell you that trying hard and doing your best is great, but that no one expects perfection.  You set a high bar for yourself and I admire your drive to succeed.  But I hope you have grace for yourself too.

It was fun to watch you play high school sports this past year.  You loved volleyball and it showed.  You enthusiastically went to every practice (even the off-season ones) and never complained about all the bumps and bruises on your body.  We loved seeing you play your role with that calm, unshakeable control that you exhibit on the court.  I know you loved it and I look forward to watching you in the years to come.

It was a tough year for you in basketball.  You struggled and fought to keep your heart in the sport and there were some really hard days to work through.  I know that you walked out of that season with some wounds – the kind I couldn’t patch up with a bandage or ease with an ice pack.  And what I saw was not a girl who had this amazing experience, but a girl who just consistently showed up, put in the effort, supported her teammates, and gave 100% effort in every minute of the game.  You are so cool and calm on the court, but beneath all that I see incredible grit.  That is a beautiful piece of you.  And I hope you never lose it.

You are a musically gifted girl – that we always knew.  This year you tried out both band and choir.  Choir stole your heart.  You love singing and performing.  You have a lovely, rich voice with great pitch and tone.  God gifted you with a beautiful voice and as much as I love watching you enjoy using it, I even more love that you use it for His praise and His glory.  Whether it be on praise team, concert choir, or wherever you find yourself performing, I pray that you will never lose that joy.

You are the house fashionista.  This should not be surprising to anyone.  I remember 4-year-old Maddie coming home from preschool and wanting to put on lip gloss.  Not a lot has changed!  You put together outfits that always look cute.  You help some of your fashion-challenged family members dress better.  You are a makeup artist and your favorite place to spend a LOT of time is Sephora.  You don’t buy much because you are too smart to blow hundreds of dollars on skin care and makeup, but you love to look at all of it.  If I ever have a product question, you are the person with the answers.

You don’t really love working, but you definitely love having money to spend.  The other day you got paid for a big month and you were pretty excited.  So excited you thought you would just go out and buy your own car.  Fortunately (for us) you didn’t have enough to buy your own set of wheels.  But you do love a good shopping spree.  Even as I say that though I am thankful for the restraint and wisdom.  You know just exactly how hard you worked for that money, and you don’t spend it frivolously (despite what your Dad may say about your lululemon purchases).  And even though you don’t love working, you are a reliable and friendly face at the local bakery.

You are still amazing with young children.  You dream of becoming a schoolteacher one day.  Your favorite thing is to teach 3^rd grade VBS in the summer.  This year you were the youngest teacher to ever be “on staff” in our preschool ministry at our church.  Just like VBS, you would take your lesson plan, practice it in your room – reading it all aloud behind a closed door.   You have a wonderful way of taking material and making it fun and interactive.  You created whole games and scavenger hunts each day in VBS.  Your classroom was decorated and designed to the max.  You have so much energy and patience for little kids that it just amazes me.

Being in the middle might be difficult for some kids, but it’s the perfect place for you.  If Reagan is busy, you have Hunter.  If Hunter is busy, you have Reagan.  You love your siblings well and rarely have big fights.  Make no mistake, you do annoy them to death at times.  But you also care so deeply about them and them for you.  I love the friendship that exists between the three of you.

You love the beach (we learned that this past summer).  You love pandas, hugs and peach rings.  You love watermelon more than you should.  You love your wonderful group of friends.  You love aesthetic spaces, gold jewelry and Taylor Swift.  You love making people laugh and taking countless pictures on your phone.  You read so many books we had to buy a Kindle for you because lugging 800+ page books around was becoming a problem.  You love word art, taking notes, and Nanalan.  You love acting but despise drama.  You’re an incredibly fun 15-year-old girl.

I hope I never forget the way you tease your Dad at the dinner table till he cracks a smile.  I hope I never forget the way you sound when you laugh hard while you try to tell us about something funny that happened at school.  I hope I never forget the way you make funny voices or faces and lighten the whole atmosphere. 

I’m proud of your accomplishments, yes.  But more so I am proud of the beautiful young woman you are growing up to be.  I see so many qualities in you that echo Jesus.  I know you have a deep faith and a gentle spirit and a wisdom far beyond your years.  I remember being afraid to have teenage daughters someday.  And yes, there are hard days.  There are days where your hurts so easily feel like mine.  There are days where you don’t like me all that much.  There are days when I wish for the “good ol’ days” of parent-problems like sleepless nights or picky eaters because teenage issues are tough!  But there are so many more beautiful moments – days where I am just so deeply grateful that I get to do this life with you.  I’m so thankful that I’ve been the one to walk alongside you through these 15 years.  And I’m so excited to see all that God has in store for you. 

I love you, Maddie Grace.

Love,

 

~Mom

Happy 11th Birthday, Hunter!

 
Dear Hunter,

Today you are 11 years old!  You’re another year older and what a year it has been!  It’s so fun to celebrate you; all that you are and all that you have accomplished.

You are one smart cookie.  It's not just that you get good grades, but also just the way you live that we can see you have a good head on your shoulders.  I appreciate the solid effort that you put into your schoolwork.  It isn’t always fun to practice spelling words at home or to study for tests, but you do it and it pays off.  You also seem to retain information really well.  It’s far from unusual to have you tell me some random piece of information full of details that I would never remember.

 

You love lots of things, but near the top of that list is coffee.  I can’t tell you how many times you have “stolen” my church coffee!  But I can let it go because on any given day, I can find you in the kitchen brewing up a pot.  You love to get a bit extra with it.  You’ve been “stealing” coffee from me since you were two years old so I’m not too surprised.  Its fun to share this coffee-love with you.  We have a good time going to coffee shops and trying different drinks.

You are our ultra-competitive child.  Whether it be a board game or a sporting event or a video game – you are always in it to win it.  Sometimes that’s really tough for you – because no one can win every single thing every single time.  But you are learning to balance those feelings.  And I’m proud of the progress I see in you.

Speaking of sports, there are two that you love more than all others.  Baseball and basketball.  This summer you had the time of your life playing baseball with your travel team (Pella Sting).  Your favorite thing is to put on those black and yellow uniforms and go out and play a game.  You are an expert outfielder.  If the ball can be caught, you will catch it.  No one worries when a hit comes your way.  You have this great anticipation – like you know where that ball is going to go before they even hit it.  And you’re very fast.  When your team won the State championship this summer I didn’t know if you would ever stop smiling.  You also love basketball and are an especially gifted left-handed shooter.  You love to make 3-pointers and you’re good at it.

 

This summer we took a trip to Oahu, Hawaii.  We visited Pearl Harbor together and toured the U.S.S. Missouri which is docked there.  You were absolutely fascinated.  That was when your obsession with all things military began.  This has led to you studying and learning about all kinds of aircraft.  You can go into all kinds of specs on various planes – some military and some not.  Its fun to hear you so fully invest your spare time in learning about aviation.

Of course, you also still love farming.  Your favorite place on earth is your Grandma’s farm.  There’s not a lot of “farming” to do there anymore, but you remember your Grandpa there.  You love to just walk around and look in the workshop and see what random pieces you can find scattered throughout the buildings.  We took a trip this past February to another family farm where you got to ride on Grandpa’s favorite tractor.  When we got in the car to come home you asked the same question you ask when we leave Grandma’s farm, “When are we coming back?”  Being on a farm, in a workshop, outside, is your favorite thing in the whole world.

You have this great ability to read out loud with such rich expression.  You are a great reader in general.  But something special happens when you are asked to read aloud.  You know, without any coaching, just how to inflect your voice.  It makes you a bit of a master storyteller.  Which is fun because we hear a lot of stories from you!

You love pigs, tigers and hamsters.  You love graphic novels and Legos.  You love shooting on your mini basketball hoop and throwing a football around.  You love energy drinks, hot chocolate and mochas.  You love burgers and roasted potatoes and donuts.  You love your sisters even though one of them kisses your ear.  You are one really neat 11-year-old boy.

You care about doing the right thing.  You don’t always make perfect choices, but I have seen you apologize and change course all on our own.  You want to do well at everything you do.  You enjoy going to church and being with your church family.  You live in a house where every single person is older than you, and I know you are watching. 

You’re a great kid, Hunter.  I honestly enjoy spending time with you and listening to you talk about school, airplanes, or farming.  I love the way you treasure memories and bring them up to just talk about them.  I love the way you laugh when you are teasing your Dad.  I love the look on your face when you are farming.  I love the way I can see God shaping you, molding you and guiding you. 

You’re a whole lot of fun and I’m so very glad that I have had 11 whole years with you!  Wow!  What a gift! 

I love you, Buddy!

Love,

~Mom

Happy 17th Birthday, Reagan!

 Dear Reagan,

Today, unbelievably, you are seventeen years old.  Seventeen years ago, they handed me your body and I finally cradled a child for which I had beseeched God for years.  I stared down at that squished face and couldn’t believe you were here.  The year you were born, your birthday fell on the day before Thanksgiving.  That first year as Thanksgiving morning dawned, I sat in a hospital room struggling to get my pain under control after a 27-hour labor and a c-section delivery.  Just you and I in the room, I held you against me and all that my overflowing heart would let me squeak out was a “Thank you.”  Through the haze of pain, I knew God had given me an incredible gift.  I didn’t know, of course, what kind of person you would turn out to be.  I could have never imagined or dreamed of the awesome woman you would grow into.  But this year, this matching scenario of a birthday the day before Thanksgiving, it is impossible not to be grateful all over again for the gift of you.  I think I can squeak out a few more words now.

I am so thankful for the wise girl that you are.  You are in hard classes as a junior.  You know things I could never understand.  Precalculus for example.  When we go to parent teacher conferences and your precalc teacher tells us what a brilliant young woman you are I have to pinch myself.  Very early on in your school career you had a year where you were struggling in math.  I tutored you through basic math facts and that’s all it took for you to take on math classes with confidence.  You bring home very good grades because you desire to do well.  You put in the time and the effort.  You apply yourself to your schoolwork.  You set goals and achieve them.  You spend the time it takes to get the results you want.  You are far smarter than your parents (in most ways).  Perfection is not a good goal, but excellence is.  Push for excellence but leave perfection out of the picture and you will not be disappointed. 

I am so thankful for the hard worker that you are.  A few years ago, you started working at Jaarsma Bakery.  You honestly enjoy it.  You pick up open shifts when it works for you because you like helping them out.  They’ve given you some new opportunities lately and you’ve taken them on willingly.  You don’t complain about work.  I imagine that everyone there breathes a sigh of relief when you walk in the door for a shift.  I love that you have developed your own descriptions of every item in the case, that you have a ready spiel of “recommendations” to give to customers who so often ask you what your favorite is, and that you are part tourist guide for your out-of-town customers who want to know the best place to grab lunch.  You take responsibility for your work, and it shows.

I am so thankful for the sister that you are to your siblings.  Even though you and Maddie reportedly look alike, you are very different personalities.  Even so, the two of you compliment each other well.  Her silliness helps you lighten up at times when you are taking things too seriously.  The two of you have fallen head over heels for Taylor Swift and that’s pretty much all I hear music-wise coming from your basement bedrooms.  Sometimes you try to mother Maddie in a way she does not initially appreciate.  I know that comes from a place of genuine care for her.  You have grown in your understanding that she is not you, she will not choose the same clothing or hair or makeup you choose, and that she is making her own way through the world.  And yet, you love that girl a whole lot.  Watching you help her with her geometry homework was the highlight of my week.  You sat there with her pencil in your hand asking her about angles and formulas all while she answered in goofy voices and took silly videos of you.  Her giggles combined with your exasperated voice saying, “Maddie!” has been a chorus in our home for years and I absolutely love it.  You adore your brother and though he loves you big right back, he most often shakes off your hugs because he is almost 11 and that it is not cool to get squeezed by surprise.  The two of you bond the most over random iPhone/iPad games which seem un-entertaining to me, but you could play for HOURS.  You are a big, important part of that boy’s life.  I’m glad he has you for an older sibling and a good example and a lifelong friend.

I am so thankful for the athlete that you have become on the tennis court.  When you were young, we sort of mistakenly thought you weren’t an athlete.  We were wrong.  I don’t remember when we first put that tennis racket in your hands but boy, am I glad we did!  You are so cool and calm and collected in tennis matches while your dad and I are on absolute pins and needles.  You have worked so hard to develop your game.  Much of your summer was spent on the courts (when you weren’t in the bakery).  Hot as it was, you took Hunter out there and you would hit and hit and hit.  You are your own worst critic and it’s tough to win the mental battle in those tough matches.  You play with such poise and integrity, and you put in the time in the off-season so that you can be the player your team needs you to be when it counts. 

I am so thankful for the pianist you are.  It’s this one that amazes me most.  You walk in the door from school or work or church and the first place you sit is at your piano.  Sometimes you sit there and work out a piece of music.  But most often you sit down and just start playing without a note or a book in sight.  You just play.  Maybe it’s a song we sang in church that week.  Maybe it’s a song you heard on the radio.  Maybe it’s a song you made up entirely on your own.  I don’t understand it at all, but you just sit down and there it is.  It’s like whatever thoughts or emotions have built up inside you just come spilling out in this avalanche of beautiful music pouring out into our home.  You always shrug when I tell you how amazing your talents are.  Just because there are people in the world who might be better than you doesn’t make your gifts any less wonderful.  That you can write and arrange piano pieces so effortlessly is an amazing talent and one that will richly bless the people in your life.  Don’t shrug it off.  Smile and be thankful that people enjoy it. 

I am so thankful for the talent trumpet player that you are.  Every year you get better and better.  Especially lately you have been working on pieces of music that make your dad and I just shake our heads.  They sound impossible.  Yet there you are, teaching them to yourself many times by looking up professional performances on YouTube so that you can hear it and mimic it.  You had an amazing year of success on trumpet as a 16-year-old/sophomore.  There were so many moments where we were just so thrilled by an honor you received, an award you had won, or an achievement you had made.  Your confidence is growing.  You handle the pressure of so many auditions so well now.  You put in the time preparing pieces for competitions, auditions, and performances.  It might be what people know you for the best.  And it is a great part of you worth celebrating.  But there’s much more to you.

I am so thankful for the quiet, thoughtful girl that you are.  You are patient beyond my understanding.  You are truth-seeking and studious and attentive about your faith.  You are determined and yet balanced.   You aren’t perfect (ie: you’ve lost your phone a lot) but you are awesome. 

I always thought I would have to “find a way to survive” the teen years of my children.  Nothing could have been more wrong.  I have LOVED your teen years.  I feel oddly guilty writing these letters sometimes.  I know that other parents have a harder time with their teens.  Why God gave me you, such an amazing young woman, I just cannot understand.  I know I played a part in who you are, but it feels small. God created you to be just exactly who you are.  You step into that more fully every year.  It’s incredible to watch.  A gift as incredible as you isn’t something I could have earned.  God specializes in giving good things that we don’t deserve.  You are a daily reminder of that to me. 

 

It’s fun to be your mom and see you become more than I ever could have dreamed seventeen years ago.  I’m so grateful for all that you have been, all that you are, and all that you will be. 

I love you, Reagan. 

Love,

Mom

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Happy 14th Birthday, Maddie!

 Dear Maddie,

Today you are 14 years old.  When I look back at this past year with you, I see so much good to celebrate.  What an incredible year you have had! 

I should not be surprised that the same girl who came home from preschool and wanted to put on lip gloss grew into an 8^th grader who loves makeup, fashion, and creating “looks”.  You are the resident fashion expert in this house.  I’m never sure what you are going to end up wearing each day, but it’s always something cute.  You frequently compliment your own family members on their outfits, and it always puts a smile on my face.

I’m not sure if you ever really stop moving.  We went right from the busyness of summer to volleyball, then straight to basketball, then straight to track.  An asthma diagnosis did not slow you down one bit.  You learned quickly how to manage that without missing a beat.  It’s been fun to watch you try so many different things to find your favorites.  You are a very good volleyball player, and I cannot wait to watch you play in high school.  You were a great basketball player as well and I loved cheering you on and watching you lead your team.  You also loved running track even though you chose one of the hardest races as your favorite (800 meter).  What I love the most about you in sports is the great teammate you are.  You are coachable.  You are respectful.  You give your all every time.  You cheer on your teammates and keep a positive attitude.  You have worked so hard at every sport, and I really admire the way you have massively improved over the years.

The highlight of your year was being involved in various theater productions.  You performed as Mother Gothel (an evil villain) in your class production of Tangled (Rapunzel).  You took ownership of that role and performed it so brilliantly.  Taking the stage with some of your best friends was the icing on the cake.  It was really fun to see you flourish on the stage.  Your confidence in your ability to deliver a scene was awesome.

Speaking if your friends…oh my goodness.  These girls!  I think it might be rare for a parent to love their kiddo’s group of friends as much as I love yours.  You four are all so fun and silly and close and encouraging.  I knew you had found just the right people when all 3 of them showed up to your basketball game one night with a poster to cheer you on.  I can SEE the way they love you and that gives my heart so much peace and joy.  You girls steer clear of drama and don’t make things complicated.  Many of my pictures of you have them in there as well and it’s just a lot of fun.

Planning for high school has been challenging at times because you just cannot choose.  You enjoy band AND choir.  You like volleyball AND basketball AND track.  You are a gifted student following in your sister's high-achieving academic footsteps.  I know whatever you choose you will put your whole heart into it.

You love makeup and neutral colors and YouTube.  You love movies and giant books.  You love pandas and leggings and tall white Nike socks.  You love your family, your friends and your nieces and nephews.  You love teaching and music and homemade crunch wraps.  You love trends and brands and shopping till we drop.  You love smoothies from Scooters, making colorful and creative to-do lists, and the art of hand-lettering. 

I love how we laugh together.  I love that I can always tease you until you smile.  I love that you like a certain boy, but you aren’t obnoxious or weird about it.  I love that I can sometimes embarrass you with my mom-awkwardness and you will just slap your head in dismay.  I love how neat and tidy you are (most of the time).  I love how responsible you are and how we can trust you to help your brother with various things when we aren’t available.  I love the way you forgive us for every time we have forgotten to pick you up from school or sports.  I love your sense of humor and the way you can always make your dad laugh. 

You aren’t perfect and you don’t have to be.  I know the heart inside of you is crazy beautiful – even moreso than the outward beauty you have.  Ultimately, the music, the acting, the sports, the academics all come second in importance.  I care so much more about walking alongside you in who you are becoming.  God gave you so many amazing talents and skills.  You are unique.  Every year with you has so many wonderful surprises.

We genuinely enjoy being around you, Maddie.  God has so many wonderful plans for your life and I am so excited to see how He will use you in His kingdom.  When something disappointing happens or you experience a hard time, pursue Him.  His purpose and vision for you is so much bigger than just this earthly life.  His promises to you are rich and abundant and trustworthy.  You are deeply and wildly loved, by your friends, your family, your church, your siblings and your parents – but most of all by your Savior.  You are not only our joy, but also His. 

Happy Birthday, Fluffy. 

I love you so.

Love,

~Mom