Happy 13th Birthday, Hunter!

Dear Hunter,

Today you are officially a teenager.  Welcome to year 13.  Let’s take a look back at this past year to see how far you’ve come.

You finished out 6^th grade and are now a 7^th grader.  School is not something you enjoy, but you get good grades.  You care about your schoolwork but you are not a perfectionist.  The only time I have ever seen you really pour your heart and soul into anything academic is when you have had to do a project.  You’ve built an incredible castle, a fantastic baseball stadium replica, and written some pretty amazing stories.  You like to do well.  But I’m also glad to see that you are not consumed by getting perfect grades. 

You have spent a lot of time farming (both in gaming form and with toy tractors and with actual life-size equipment).  You are a farm toy expert.  You know stats and information about all kinds of equipment.  I like to consider myself someone who knows a thing or two about farming because I grew up on a farm.  You know far more than I do now.  The fascination with tractors and equipment runs deep, but your heart is fully in the red tractor category.  I love to listen to you talk and talk and talk about tractors and combines and all the many implements.  I look forward to the day when you can sit down and have these talks with the one who would have LOVED to talk to you about all of that.  I sometimes imagine you and your Grandpa sitting down and having long talks about farming.  I love that you remind me of him in so many ways. 

Gaming takes up a fair amount of your time too.  Like any middle school boy, you play games that make absolutely no sense and are full of gibberish words that you then go around saying on endless repeat.  The slang in this house is a real thing.  I’ve earned my fair share of eye rolls when I’ve tried to use that slang in our conversations.  You are not impressed.  And that’s okay.  You and I have this fun relationship where we can tease each other and laugh about it.  You seem to understand my sarcastic dry sense of humor better than most.  I seem to understand what makes a 13-year-old boy laugh.  It’s fun to banter with you.

Your relationship with your sisters is strong and deep.  Reagan moved away to college a few months ago.  To say that goodbye was brutally hard would be an understatement.  It was a huge adjustment for all of us.  For you it was tough because so often she was the one who would play those nonsense online games with you.  You have a special bond with her.  It’s fun to watch the two of you interact because it’s almost like you have your own language.  Maddie is still here though that time is dwindling too.  You like to tease her.  She likes to tease you.  There’s this foundational trust between the two of you.  You take care of each other in ways that I like to see. 

Growing up with two sisters and no brothers has made you into this certain kind of boy.  You aren’t phased when they drop a kiss on your head.  You aren’t thrown off by big emotions.  You understand how to be kind to a girl.  Various girl-related topics are not at all disturbing to you in any way, shape or form.  I think in the long run this is making you into a kid who has a compassion and gentleness that not everyone carries with them in the world. 

We went through the Holocaust Museum this summer in Washington, D.C.  I knew it would be a journey for each of us, but I watched you closely as you went through.  I watched your face.  Your eyes were often wide in disbelief.  There were times when you asked me if certain things had really happened.  And then you would just shake your head when I would quietly explain the atrocities that had occurred.  I could see that it didn’t sit well with you (as well it shouldn’t).  But I knew you well enough to know that it bothered you a little more because you truly are a kind kid.  You don’t treat others badly.  In fact, when there are situations where there is a tough kid you have chosen to be kind and inclusive rather than mean and spiteful.  I really like this about you.  I hope its something you always carry with you in the world.

Basketball is something you enjoy.  You are a long-range shooter and a good defender.  You spend a lot of time on the basketball court near our house.  It annoys you greatly when none of the shots are falling.  But when the shots are falling, you can’t miss.  Dad likes to tell a story about how he took you to shoot one evening.  There were some kids playing on half the court.  You walked onto the court and launched three huge long-range three pointers that you absolutely drained.  Those kids just stood and stared at you.  Basketball is a tough sport the older you get.  The competition for playing time becomes this whole thing.  I don’t know what the future holds for you on the court.  But I know that I enjoy watching you play right now.  I like your toughness and determination.  I like your team-player mindset.  I like your drive to compete. 

We can’t talk about sports without talking about your biggest love: baseball.  I won’t forget what happened this past summer for a very very long time – maybe never.  Countless hours of practice with the team.  Throwing with your Dad every single day.  So so so much time in the cage or on a diamond with a bat in your hands.  You are far from the biggest player on the team, but your hard work and personal practice time made an enormous impact.  Your team is Pella Sting.  There were tournaments all spring and summer.  Some went well.  Some didn’t.  It was a solid season.  But when the State Tournament brackets came out – we all groaned.  They had placed Sting in the Elite bracket – which meant you would have to play the best teams in the whole state.  Yikes.  No one thought that would go well.

So we showed up that first hot day, layered on the sunscreen, slapped on the eyeblack, tied the cleats, set out our lawnchairs and umbrellas and watched Sting win the first game.  And then you won the second game.  And then the third.  For three days we sat there, your families, watching you and your teammates play the best baseball you have ever played.  It was hard to fathom. 

I try occasionally to explain to someone what watching Sting play ball is like.  I’ve seen many first-time watchers show up expecting to see an almost Little League-like team.  I like watching their eyes pop open in wide amazement as they see you boys warm up.  You throw so so so hard.  As the game goes on those first-time watchers will say, “This is incredible.  I can’t believe they are this good.”  You play center field.  You catch anything catchable and even some that aren’t.  When the other team hits a pop fly into center field, my heart rate actually calms down.  I know you’ll get it.  And you do. 

Through those three outrageously hot days we sat and sweated (not just heat-related).  And you guys did it.  You won.  I will soak in that smile on your face for the rest of my life.  There were battles on those fields – keeping the emotions in check while still playing your heart out.  You did that masterfully.  Even when something didn’t go your way, you never gave up.  You guys fought together for each other. 

Life is that way too.  Things don’t always go your way.  Sometimes a friend hurts you.  Sometimes you bomb a test.  Sometimes you miss an opportunity.  Sometimes you lose.  But you keep going.  That’s one of the things I love the most about you, Hunter.  You don’t quit.  There will be major disappointments along the way – huge frustrations in your future – painful moments from which I want to protect you.  But don’t stop.  Keep your faith in focus.  Try.  Then try again.  Then try again. 

God has these great plans for you.  You are growing into the guy He created you to be.  All those big wins are a part of that.  All the big losses are too.  So stay the course.  Follow His game plan.  It takes practice.  You are no stranger to practice.  But the practice makes those faith muscles stronger. 

I have loved watching you grow over these 13 years.  I look forward to watching you for the next 13…and many more. 

Happy Birthday Hunter!

I love you!

~Mom

Happy 16th Birthday, Maddie!

 Dear Maddie,

Today you are sixteen years old.  When I think about you as my daughter, I admit that my mind first pictures you at about the age of 3 or 4 – your hair all fluffy and floating in the breeze.  Your big gap-toothed smile and the sparkle in your eye.  Your tiny self, full of big enthusiasm for everything.  And your constant need to be hugged.  You are not this tiny girl anymore.  But when I remember who you once were I still see her in you. 

You are still one smart kid.  You don’t just get good (very very good) grades in school, but you also make wise choices.  When there are situations in life that require hard decisions, you really think it all through carefully.  Whether it be how to manage your time or a friendship issue, you take your time to fully process and look at all the options.  I love this about you.  I can see that God has given you a great gift of wisdom and discernment and it’s wonderful to celebrate that about you.

You are diligent and hardworking.  You made the switch this year to a new place of employment.  You got your dream job of working in a clothing retail store.  I can honestly say that you were made for this role.  So many times when shopping you give such good advice.  You are honest but also flattering when appropriate.  You have a wonderful eye for fashion and always dress nicely.  You take your work seriously and I think customers appreciate your attentiveness and gentle guidance.

That same diligence comes into play when we talk about you as an athlete.  You work hard at your sports.  You played volleyball again this year.  You’re very good at that because you fall down a lot (sorry, its true).  But you pop right back up with a smile and a laser focus.  You are also in soccer this year.  That was a bit of a surprise, but you wanted to be in a sport with some of your friends and you are giving in a whirl.  I’m not surprised to say you are doing a great job.  I knew you would put your heart and soul into working at it and learning it.  You have played goalie some and though it terrifies me you are absolutely fearless and aggressive and brave.  It’s fun to watch you play any sport, honestly.  You have a gentle easy joy when you play.  While you take it seriously, you don’t take it TOO seriously and you still have fun with it.  I love watching you play.

You are the middle child.  With a big sister you have watched her do all the things first.  Sometimes you have followed in her footsteps because she made wise choices that you could respect and imitate.  Sometimes you have gone your own way because you wanted to express your personality and gifting.  You are truly you – not a copy of Reagan – but a uniquely wonderful young lady who has her own likes and dislikes.  Of course you are also a big sister to Hunter.  The two of you are a party.  There’s just no other way to describe it.  You love him and dote on him and absolutely pester him to death.  I think he gives it right back to you.  There’s a lot of laughter on your part and a lot of yelling on his.  The two of you take ridiculous pictures together which he has forbidden me from sharing.  If we need a good laugh all we have to do is pull out your phone and look through your pictures and videos.  And yet, there is a deep love between all three of you.  I love the friendship that I see there.  You have dear dear friends for life in your siblings.  I hope you know how fiercely loved you are by them.

You take your faith seriously.  You seem to thoroughly enjoy reading, learning, growing in your faith.  I love the way you make your sermon notes a work of visual art.  I love that I can find you sitting at your desk or in your chair in your room doing your devotions.  I love the way you seek out those same deep-faith qualities in your friendships.  You are governed by a set of rules far above the ones that we have in our home.  And that is by your choice.  You live as a reflection of your Savior and it’s a beautiful thing to see.

You love to spend time with children.  You teach VBS and our preschool Sunday school class each year.  You genuinely enjoy putting together the lessons and leading the kids through the activities and stories.  You are so patient and gracious with them.  I don’t know what your future will hold, but any children in your life will be blessed by you.

There’s something about you that just lights up the room.  Is it your smile or your eyes or your personality?  Maybe all of those?  Maybe it’s just the way you are attentive and kind to others.  You draw people in.  You have so many friends.  You get along with people in all different circles.  And you are welcoming to others in such a wise way.  I love how you love others but also are mindful of guarding your heart.  It’s so difficult to balance vulnerability with carefulness.  But you seem to do it so well.  That is something I have always admired about you.

You still love pandas and squishmallows and jellycat stuffed animals.  You love chocolate and peach rings.  You love big acai bowls and bananas and fancy coffee drinks.  You love cute outfits, makeup and long hair.  You love being healthy and going for walks with friends.  You love the Great British Baking Show (kids edition) and movies.  You love your stuffed animals like they are real creatures and your siblings like they are best friends.  Overall – you just do that – you love. 

On your sixteenth birthday I hope you know just how loved you are in return.  You see, sixteen-year-old you is still that little girl full of sparkle and fun and humor and determination and tenderness.  You have this beautiful way of seeing people and what they are feeling.  And you don’t turn away from it.  You so gently come alongside those who are hurting or struggling and offer a peaceful presence and a quiet word of encouragement.  You’ve done that for me many times.  It isn’t something a parent really expects from their child.  But so many times you have seen when I am having a bad day (or a bad string of days) and you’ve offered your love and encouragement with a simple text or email or hug. 

I’m so proud of the woman you are becoming.  You are a gift to all of us.

I love you, Maddie Grace.

Always,

 

~Mom

Happy 12th Birthday, Hunter!

 Dear Hunter,

Today you are 12 years old.  It’s difficult to remember the days before you were a part of our family.  I remember so clearly the looks on the faces of your big sisters when they walked in the hospital room to meet you.  They were smiling so big and with so much joy.  I don’t think you have ever known a day where they were not happy to see you.  You are deeply loved and a critical piece of this family.

You are a smart kiddo.  With two big sisters modeling hard work and determination, you typically also put forth your best effort.  Taking on more responsibility for your grades and studying in Middle School has been a small adjustment.  But you are figuring it out and doing well.  I am proud of the way you have tried hard and developed a solid work ethic when it comes to your academics.

Nothing shows your determination quite like watching you in sports.  You work hard in every practice, every game, every competition.  The hours you spend in personal practice are significant.  Whether it be on your own or with your Dad or one of your sisters, you spend a lot of time on a baseball diamond, in a batting cage, or on a basketball court.  Though you are growing in size, you are not big.  Most of the time, the other kids on the field or the court tower over you.  But what you lack in size, you make up for in effort and game knowledge.  You are an excellent shot on the basketball court.  And on a baseball field you can catch anything. 

I realized something recently as I was watching you play in a school kickball tournament.  You were one of the youngest kids on the field.  And yet you were out there silently leading your team.  Let’s just say you guys were not winning.  And me…I was a mess on the sideline.  I had become accustomed to watching you compete at an incredibly high level over the summer with your travel baseball team.  Let’s put it this way: it’s not normal to watch you play on a team that is losing.  Now, this kickball game really didn’t matter.  It dawned on me that 1) your competitive nature is genetic, and 2) you handle it better than I do.  I’ve seen you when you are winning.  And I have seen you when you are losing.  And I am immensely proud of you in both of those situations.  You handle gametime pressure with great integrity, calmness and sportsmanship.

Free time at home is spent shooting baskets on your mini basketball hoop, building lego speed cars, crawling behind a toy tractor, going on scooter rides around the block, watching youtube videos or playing games on your tablet.  Most nights I will find you crafting model planes or basketball hoops out of cardboard and candy wrappers in your room.  I like how you still find time to be creative and inventive.

One of your skills is that you can read extremely well and with great expression.  I could hand you a paragraph and you could easily read it cold in front of a group of people.  This is not a skill you are particularly interested in exhibiting or using.  And yet, I know it is one that will serve you well in the future.  You really do present well and seem unphased by public speaking.

Your two big sisters are some of your biggest fans.  They love to encourage you and support you.  Sometimes you don’t really love the attention.  But most of the time, you enjoy hanging out with them, harassing them, or playing “Jailbreak” with them.  The three of you are good friends.  I hope you are always close to them.  They love you more than I can describe, and I know you feel the same way.

You have a fun sense of humor, but it’s a delicate balance.  There are definitely times when you like to be funny and make us laugh.  You’re a master of the lingo and we hear “skibidi” and “sigma” and “cap” more than we can possibly interpret.  But there are also times when we would love to tease you that you absolutely do not appreciate.  You can be very serious at times.  That is not a bad thing – its just a balancing act.

Still your favorite place on earth is Grandma’s farm.  You love to walk around outside and explore through the buildings that you’ve been in countless times.  You have always loved it out there.  The great big yard is perfect for sports and activities.  The house is as familiar to you as our own.  And the outbuildings still hold traces of your Grandpa.  I know you love it because you feel close to him there.  There is still a fierce love in you for your Grandpa.  You remind me of him when you tease us.  You remind me of him when you play baseball.  You remind me of him when you watch a basketball game and have all kinds of commentary. 

This is not an easy time to grow up.  I don’t know if any time in history would be described as “easy”, but this era is one full of hazards that haven’t really been navigated before.  Digital media and the ever presence of technology is a lot to manage for adults, much less preteens.  We are doing our best as parents, but it feels like we are constantly adjusting rules or expectations or boundaries.  What is wise and acceptable one day can be suddenly not okay the next.  I’m praying that through all of this you will gain wisdom over how to exist as a Godly boy in an online world.  It’s a challenging place full of dangerous traps and problematic options.  It can be used for good, but it can also be used against you for evil. 

You love sci-fi movies, aviation, and hiking in the woods.  You love tigers, hamsters, and your stuffed pig “Wanda”.  You love cheeseburgers, scalloped potatoes and bismarks.  You love coffee and make a whole pot whenever I ask you to do so.  You are a great kid – one I enjoy spending time with and one I am very proud to call my own. 

The years ahead will bring some changes for you and for us.  You are growing up and some of your siblings will soon be heading off to college.  One day we will have to say goodbye to the farm you love so dearly.  There are things about life right now that you and I would like to freeze and hold onto forever.  It’s not that I don’t want you to get any older, but more that I want to soak up all the awesomeness of who you are right now.  I don’t want to forget the way you laugh, the look on your face when you step up to that plate with a bat in your hands, the sound of your voice telling me a story about PE at school.  Those are the golden joys that I hold close.  No matter what tomorrow brings, I know Who holds your future.  He loves you more than I ever could.  I pray you will continue to look to Him, to lean into Him and to trust in Him with whatever comes your way.

I love you, Hunter.

Always,

~Mom